The week that never ended...

Soo the diet is going.. I think the fact that I do daycare helps keep me eating healthier.. We abide by a monthly menu that helps me prepare ahead of time and is completely nutritious.. but people.. this weekend I am going to blow my diet.. just for the weekend though.. Tomarrow is my husbands birthday (35) so we are going to dinner at our local greek place , and maybe drinks afterwords. Saturday is Ladies night , and there will be a bunch of women and chocolate and some alcohol... I an't wait.. I jsut have to get thru tomarrow...
One more day....

Phatty girl..

Random person- "You.. had six kids? You look great for having six kids.."
Me- in my head.. "but I don't want to look like I had any..."
I am tired of being overly chubby.. I have used to many excuses for too long..
I want my body back..Althouh I have never seen my body ..Basically I have been preggo for 10 years. I went from having this hot smaller teenage body.. to this.. I am by no means morbidly obese but I am very overweight. I need to take that step and start doing things.. I turn 29 in about 4 months and I want to know what it is like for me to have some what thinner((by my standards))body.. honestly to go back to what I weighed before I got pregnant with my first child I would have to lose about 75 lbs. Honestly that number scares the living piss out of me.. I want to start with a much smaller number .. about 40lbs.. right now that seems more attainable to me. I loved my body after I had my 2nd child and I feel comfortable heading to that weight.. so in my mind and forgive me if this is a ass-backward attempt in doing this but it makes sense in my hardwired brain.

short term goal- 8months- 1 year- 40lbs
long term goal- 2 years (roughly) - the last 35

I am going to do this by myself using the elff(Eat Less Fatty Foods) diet.. I found it online by another mother of 6 kids ..and her story is MINE.(.http://momtothescreamingmasses.typepad.com/the_elf_diet/2007/04/about_post.html)I love it! my worries concerns.. and excuses... have all been hers... Fad diets do not work for me and with my health history I don't want to harm my body anymore if I have too.. I can do this... I know I can..

No more excuses .. I am going to use this as my online diary also... I have to do this for myself..I WANT TO DO THIS..

UPDATE!!!

Obviously I haven't been back here in almost a year..
So much has completely changed in the last 10 months.
We have moved from our small 4 bedroom duplex to a large victorian
6 bedroom home.. with the space to TADA.. have my own daycare.. completely
separate from my home.

I love it here.. I don't miss the old home at all ... granted it was close to
wally world .. but there is life besides commercial shopping centers..

Keith has decided to stay home with me , to help run the daycare , so we can expand and don't have to put out the cash for a employee.. It greatly helps out.

So yes.. alot has changed and I do plan on updating this way more often..((I was worried I forgot my password..))I will be back...

I wish I had a cup of Christmas Cheer

I am tired.. not just that I got up on the wrong side of the bed tired .. but the I can't see straight, bone weary achy muscle tired. It's sucky. This past month everything has been going wrong at my house.. my toilets broke, my dryers broke..our bank is broke.. My husband is broke. It sucks ... but we have gone through worse. Right?

The biggest problem I have right now, is that my husband is SEVERLY depressed. I have never, ever seen him this way. EVER. Normally we can talk about it and I can cheer him up enough to get him going. Not anymore. I have reached my limit. I feel like such a cold heartless bitch. I have tried getting him to talk to me but it turns into a battle.. I get my defenses up , beleive me Lord, I really try not to.
I don't know what to do. I want to help him ,but, I have come to the point where I just don't know how.

I had him talk to my mom, but that really didn't seem like it worked. He will not talk tohis friends. The friends I have talked to aren't very much help. Orthey just don't want to. I am frustrated, pissed and feel very much alone. I am making this as best as I possibly can for the kids. I just don't know what to do.

Depression alientates not only the person who is depressed but the whole family.
Merry Christmas.

Manic Monday

The Kitchen .. it has been cleaned. I have been neglecting the room that is the most important in this house. It was driving me insane.. so after breakfast.. I toiled..and sweat ..and toiled some more...

But it is done ..and until 3pm It will remain perfectly spotless until..
the children of destruction arrive and then...


I will cry.

LAZY ARSE I AM, I AM

So I have been avoiding you. Well, not all of you, just some of you.
Kidding aside. Holiday's are crazy, We have been traveling all over. Visiting
family, friends and hobo's on the street. To spead good cheer , you know?

My daycare is putting on a christmas program , which is very entertaining, I am trying to teach my 4 one-year-olds how to sing " All I want for Christmas" ,NOT working.. at all . They just sway side to side and push each other down . Very cute , very entertaining. MY older daycare kids will be doing 'Jingle Bell Rock'
with sunglasses. Very Elvis Presley..

OK,on to more important things,like what I need for Christmas.Just give me Wentworth Miller. Wrapped in a bow, or you can keep the bow.Give me him and I will be whistling dixie for the next year. My husband won't mind, I will just hid Mr. Miller in the closet, or under the bed. Better yet I can introduce him as my pool boy , even though the closest thing I have to a pool is a little 7'inch high thing, oh, and did I forget to mention that it's below 30 degrees? Well Wenty-dear can thaw my ice.

Christmas programs and hot men... just the thing to get me back in the swing of things!

I suck and I know it!

just kidding ..obviously I have been a total lazy ass when it comes to posting, and I know the whole sick kid excuse is a no go , so we will just blame it on my fear of commitment, ok? You know I love you , but I just can't commit to you. I am such a man..just kidding ya'll.

Anyway the party is coming along fine, and I pretty have all the 'nasty' games that will make my guests either scream with delight or gasp in horror..(I would rather see delight) and I found a whole bunch of raunchy snacks , like jello boobies,(no mine will not be served) penis suckers for the ladies, and a couple of other not so classy things. I am going to make slushy drinks with quite a bit o' alcohol. I guess to put it mildly we are hoping to have a night of debauchery!

Mocha Momma I definatly want you there ! Quick fly out to Montana and pary with us !